Legal Theft: Delta Zeta Kappa

The night was coming off its full swing. No one had left yet, but the music had been changed twice mid-song, and people had passed out in both bathrooms. Unlucky young men began to scour the main rooms a little more desperately.

Kimberly Nash ignored them, she only had eyes for the couple out on the porch. Through the dirty glass, and glare from the lights, it was hard to make out exactly who they were. Kimberly had an idea though, it was a bad one.

“What are you looking at?” Anna Myong asked, moving to Kimberly’s elbow. Noxious smelling blue liquid sloshed in the red cup she carried. Hannah Lewis joined them a moment later, phone in hand. The three sorority sisters peered through the sliding glass door.

“Is that?” Hannah asked.

“No—“ Anna breathed.

“I’m gonna kill him.” Kimberly’s eyes narrowed to slits. Out on the back porch, the girl had her fingers hooked in their philosophy TA’s waistband. It was him, dark blond hair, sharp chin, and muscled arms wrapped around some girl who was not their newest pledge and sister. He let himself be pulled closer and the couple kissed. The three of them shared a collective breath.

“Sara’s gonna kill him.” Anna corrected. “Who’s the skank?”

“Don’t know, but he’s got a type.” Hannah smirked, but stopped smiling when Kimberly gave her a hard look.

“Shut up Hannah, Sara’s new, we have to look out for her.” Kimberly said, turning her glare back to where it belonged. Outside things were getting physical. Her fingers twitched, and she glanced towards the phone in Hannah’s hands. “Take a picture, but don’t send it to anyone. No one messes with Delta Zeta Kappa.”


“Is this an intervention?” Sara asked. Her sorority sisters gathered in the living room, somber expressions all around. Behind her Anna Myong closed the door to the hallway. Anna offered Sara a phone.

Sara took the device with a bemused expression. The gallery was up on the screen, and she flicked through the pictures. An expensive car filled with purple glitter, a tiny office coated in yellow and pink. The files and computer on the desk were wrecked, complete messes of shimmering plastic dust. She looked up from the screen.”Which of you murdered a unicorn?”

Kimberly Nash stood up. “Sean is cheating on you. We saw him on Friday with another girl. He paid for it. We are so sorry.”

Sara blinked at the girls slowly rising from their seats in mournful solidarity. It was too much, she burst out laughing. “Oh shit, that’s his stuff?” She doubled, arms holding her stomach, as a fresh wave of laughter choked her. It took a moment to catch her breath, while the room waited in nervous silence. “Damn, that is so sweet of you all, but he’s not cheating. At least on me.”

“Sara, we saw him. Hannah has pictures, but we’re so sorry. We got him good though.” Kimberly went forward as if to give her a hug.

“He can’t cheat on me because we were never dating, I was just fooling around. Having fun.” Sara said. Behind Kimberly,  Hannah muttered something that sounded a lot like skank. Sara grinned wider and avoided Kimberly by passing back Anna’s phone. “Remind me never to piss you guys off. Glitter is fucking brutal. Used it once for a concert a year ago and I’m still finding it in the weirdest places. Are those solidarity shots? Aww, you guys.”

Kimberly, Anna, and Hannah looked between themselves helplessly as Sara started pouring what were supposed to consolation shots.

Not only am I thief, but I have done something horrible to one of More than 1/2 Mad‘s characters. She challenged me with glitter and revenge though, so its hardly my fault.


One response to “Legal Theft: Delta Zeta Kappa

  1. Pingback: October 15 2016 – Vengeance and Glitter – Legal Theft Project

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